Yesterday was my day for doctor visits or so I thought or was led to believe. There is this little procedure that the surgeon's office forgot to explain; that when you "see the anesthesiologist" you are actually seeing 4 other people and it is a Pre-operative visit! That would have been nice to know.
When the appointments were made, I even questioned why such a long time to speak with the anesthesiologist and she said that was "kind of normal", Yeh when you have to have an EKG, a history and physical, a visit from Patient Services, a nurse that needs your Blood pressure and a "chat" with the anesthesiologist who wants to tell you about the "planned day" and also hear any concerns you might have. I had a few, like you might want to know that I stop breathing when I am in the recovery room! He did think that was important, I did tell him that other Anesthetists were educated on my sensitivity first hand, as the old adage states "alls well that ends well". After going over my story 4 separate times and with many questions one of the health care providers wondered what brought on the tears as I had just been laughing and making jokes? Well we were all tearing up, I explained that although this had been fun it was quite exhausting to rehash the past 5 months 4 separate times to 4 separate people and that most of these questions would or were answered on my medical history sheet that I had provided them (it was there buried in all their little paperwork, who said technology is alive and working efficiently?). After a somewhat practiced statement of it's good to get your emotions out instead of keeping them inward(she didn't know I was a Gardner) I was released to my surgeon's appointment.
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This visit was more positive as I learned that I had dropped another two pounds (yes I know it's a hell of a weight loss program) that bringing my total drop to date of 11 pounds. Yes keep it going! The surgeon's surgical nurse (her name is Debbie too) went over (finally) the results of the MRI, the MRI that I had done there on 8/20/09 showed no involvement of the left side, so that's good news. The reason for the delay in giving me these results arose due to the "comparison" or original MRI that was done on 8/29/07, it was some kind of random slides that didn't make sense to their radiologist so instead of stating that to his assistant or anyone so that they could call me, nothing was said until yesterday afternoon as I was sitting there. As some of you know that will be taken care of this Friday as I visit the Orange Imaging Center and offer some constructive criticism on what they sent to UCSD. A clinical trials research student came in and asked if I wanted to be part of a study that was trying to determine what actually causes this disease (I have a lot of adjectives but it's better if I just say disease) and I agreed so she needed blood, urine and tissue, I told her she needed to wait on the tissue as I wasn't ready to give that up today. LOL The surgical nurse Debbie gave me a really nice notebook on the implant that I was getting(hey that's where the pharmaceutical companies spend their money on stupid books in a great presentation to explain nothing) and asked me sign a disclaimer regarding the "small implant", after reading 8 different ways that it could "make problems for me in the future" I said I am not sure I want that in there. Considering that I will have a serial number for the rest of my life and the "maybe problems" why do that? Well they explained, they really have never had any problems with Allergan implants in the past but they are required to give you this information. Yes I know the requirement and the laws to protect all companies but really does your product work or not? There I have said it why is it that we as a nation or government feel the need to constantly disclaim so as to not feel accountable if something goes wrong? Oh I digress...
Back to me and my upcoming "event". I am feeling overwhelmed: at the surgery (it's an 8 hour procedure); for the recovery which some say will be painful some say you really won't feel anything as you will be numb for quite a while; (yea my right arm in some places is still numb after 10 years), for the thoughts of getting this home packed up and shipped off back east (I know that a lot of you have stretched out your arms and more than willing to help, don't you worry you will be called upon). I feel blessed: that so many of you have sent prayers, thoughts and good wishes as well as your offers to do whatever whenever for me and my family. This is what I will dwell over, not the cancer for to do that gives it validity. Cancer has no valid place in my life or my body or my mind. For that matter cancer is but a small speck and if we keep that in it's place we will be better people for that as diseases/illnesses do not "own" us, we are allowed to detach ourselves from them.
For myself, I lean on the Lord for strength, peace, comfort and healing and any other need I can't think of right now. Thanks again for your support,
Hugs, Deb
I hear your aggrevation of having to repeat your history everytime you see a new Medi person. I believe that is a part of the regiment. Really it is because none of them know how to read and they don't know how to tell you. As far as a serial number it's not that it is your human microchip in case your dogs ever lose you. All kidding aside you've got alot on your plate this week and moving at the same time...you don't have time to be ill!! Good thoughts,hugs, and of course prayers are all yours..Paula
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